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Character Lists: Seven Up
Seven Up
Stephanie Plum - Galactic Princess. Well... OK, that was the plan in her childhood. She's actually a bounty hunter now.
Joe Morelli - Bad kid who grew up to be a good cop. He's still trouble, but he's the kind of trouble that women like.
Vinnie - Stephanie's cousin and employer. He looks like a ferret and if you believe the graffiti, he humps like one too.
Eddie DeChooch - An old guy who kills people. He is a FTA now, charged with smuggling cigarettes.
Ranger - Soldier of fortune type of guy who takes work as a bounty hunter. He's good in a variety of ways, and he's scary as hell.
Connie Rosolli - Vinnie's office manager. She runs the business while Vinnie pursues various perversions. She's got big hair, big boobs and a mustache.
Jimmy Curtains - Burg criminal of some notoriety.
Two Toes Garibaldi - One of Jimmy Curtain's victims.
Lula - Vinnie's filing clerk and Stephanie's sometime sidekick. She's a big lady with a tight wardrobe and she takes no grief.
Angela Marguchi - Eddie DeChooch's neighbor.
Aunt Rose - Stephanie's aunt. She had an operation to fix her cataracts. Not to be confused with Morelli's Aunt Rose.
Valerie - Stephanie's sister. Up until now she has been the perfect daughter, but she has run into some marital problems.
Loretta Ricci - Woman that Stephanie found with five bullet holes in her head.
Carl Costanza - Trenton cop who always seems to be around when Stephanie has a disaster.
Big Dog - Costanza'a partner.
Mooner - Stephanie's spaced-out friend Walter Dunphy. He is widely known for experimenting with pharmaceuticals.
Helen Plum - Stephanie's long-suffering mother. She uses ironing and tippling to help her cope with the stress.
Emily Beeber - A burg gossip.
Joanne Marlinoski - Woman who is lucky enough have a daughter who never finds dead bodies.
Rex - Stephanie's curiously long-lived hamster.
Grandma Mazur - Stephanie's grandmother. She moved in with Stephanie's parents when Grandfather Mazur took his bucket of quarters to the big poker slot machine in the sky.
Dominic Ricci - Loretta Ricci's husband. She went man-crazy after he died.
Frank Plum - Stephanie's father. Grandma Mazur gets under his skin, but he doesn't say much about it... that anyone can make out.
Doris Szuch - Friend of Grandma Mazur.
Ziggy Garvey - Friend of Eddie DeChooch.
Benny Colucci - Friend of Eddie DeChooch.
Ronald DeChooch - Eddie DeChooch's nephew. He runs Ace Pavers and imagines himself to be quite the ladies' man.
Dougie Kruper - AKA "The Dealer". Mooner's pal. He was recently busted for fencing stolen goods, but it was more of a community service.
Anthony Varga - Recently deceased man who is laid out at Stiva's.
Carol Borchek - Recently deceased woman who is laid out at Stiva's.
Harold Barrone - Stiva's assistant.
Myra Szilagy - She says they're hiring at the button factory.
Bob - Stephanie and Morelli's dog. He's a cross between a golden retriever and Chewbacca.
Tom Bell - Trenton Police department's primary on the Loretta Ricci case.
Joyce Barnhardt - Stephanie's arch enemy. Years ago, she boinked Stephanie's husband (now ex-husband). Stephanie gets back at her by taking Bob to poop on her lawn.
Florence Selzer - One of DeChooch's ladies, back in the day.
Joe the Rug - Florence's husband. He turned up missing after shooting Eddie DeChooch in the posterior.
Huey Kosa - Mooner's roommate.
Zero Bartha - Mooner's roommate.
Norma - Stephanie's friend at the DMV.
Dodie Carmine - Burg resident who recently got a boob job.
Uncle Bingo - Connie's uncle, who is also looking for Eddie DeChooch.
Aunt Flo - Connie's aunt, who says that something went wrong when Eddie DeChooch went down to Virginia.
Marilyn Biaggi - She tried to get the firehouse for her daughter Carolyn's wedding shower.
Betty Szajack - Grandma Mazur's gossiping friend.
Marjorie Swit - Another one of Grandma Mazur's gossiping friends.
Steven - Valerie's husband.
Angie - Valerie's daughter. She's eight years old... going on forty.
Mary Alice - Valerie's daughter who thinks she's a horse.
Louie D - A big "businessman" who recently died of a heart attack. He was mixed up with Eddie DeChooch somehow.
Estelle Colucci - Louie D's sister, and Benny Colucci's wife.
Tina - Proprietor of Tina's Bridal Shoppe. She lives in a small apartment upstairs from the store.
Father Carolli - Priest who is old as dirt and has lived in the Burg forever.
Roseanne Freiner - FTA hooker who is accused up beating up one of her clients.
Eddie Gazarra - Trenton cop and long-time friend of Stephanie. He's married to her cousin, Shirley-the-Whiner.
Mrs. DeGuzman - Lady who lives in Stephanie's building. She's from the Philippines.
Mary Maggie Mason - Works at the Snake Pit as a mud wrestler. She is a local star.
Elaine Barkolowski - One of Grandma Mazur's wild friends.
Pinwheel Soba - Part owner of The Snake Pit. He's currently in Miami.
Dave Vincent - Part owner of The Snake Pit.
Constantine Stiva - The Burg's favorite undertaker.
Carmine Scallari - Word is Grandma Bella gave him the eye and he couldn't "perform" anymore.
Mrs. Dugan - Purveyor of Burg gossip.
Lucille Stiller - She had to cancel her reception at the PNH Hall.
Myron Birnbaum - Attendee of Loretta Ricci's viewing.
Mrs. Belski - He's retired from Stucky Tool and Die Company.
Spotty - The Belski's yappy little dog.
Melvin Baylor - He got arrested for peeing on his ex-wife's wedding cake at her reception. Now he is a FTA.
Mr. Morgenstern - Resident of Stephanie's building. He's really old, maybe two hundred.
Janice Molnari - Joyce Barnhardt's partner. She's an OK person, so it's hard to say how she got mixed up with Joyce.
Loretta Beeber - A mutual acquaintance of Stephanie and Janice Molnari.
Madame Zaretsky - A local "entertainer" who specializes in dogs and whips.
Animal - One of the female mud wrestlers down at The Snake Pit.
Aunt Rose - Morelli's aunt who left him her house when she passed away.
Mickey Greene - A Trenton bicycle cop.
Anthony Thumbs - Member of the "family" who basically runs Trenton.
Sophia DeStephano - Louie D's wife.
Mickey Spritz - Proprietor of The Tip Top, a small home cooking restaurant.
Pookie Potter - Handicapped guy who works at The Tip Top.
Omar - He runs Omar's Meat Market on Stark Street.
Gordon Skyler - Friend of Morelli's who lives near Joyce Barnhardt.
Christina Gallone - Sophia DeStephano's sister.
Joe Juniak - Trenton's police chief.
Mabel Pritchet - One of Grandma Mazur's friends.
Mr. Arnold - Hairdresser at a local Burg mall.
Janeane - Valerie's date.
Rusty Kuharchek - Schoolmate of Grandma Mazur who is laid out at Stiva's.
Billy Kwiatikowski - A Trenton cop.
Tank - One of Ranger's employees.

